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October 01, 2003October 1, 2003
Inspired by this humane trend Horsefeathers suggests other venues for its expression. Doctors might identify to a deceased patient’s family that he or she is “A” for “almost alive” instead of “D” for you know what. Or instead of “B” for the harsh term “Bankrupt,” how about “C,” “close to solvency.” And wouldn’t it be nicer if instead of “G” for “guilty,” the judge declared that the defendant was “I,” “in the neighborhood of innocent.” A political candidate might be spared the painful outcome of “L” for “lost” by the letter “O” for “on the point of winning.” Horsefeathers invites other Desperate Euphemisms from its readers. Posted at 10:30 PM by
 
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A person is no longer a lying, child-sodomite nazi cockroach, but instead suffers from CUBS, or Chronic Undifferentiated Bastard Syndrome.
One no longer receives oral sex. Instead, one Gets a Clinton. "Hey, Clinton THIS one time."
Wearing a bundt cake on your head to ward off intrusive thoughts is no longer a sure sign of dementia, but is merely an example of IPBG, or Imaginate Play with Baked Goods.
Posted by: Natty Codpiece on October 2, 2003 01:56 AM"Britain’s Qualifications and Curriculum Authority have replaced the “F” for “fail” in English, and science, with “N” for “nearly.” I SUPPOSE THIS GOES FOR SCOTTISH SCHOOLS AS WELL (A DIFFERENT SCHOOL SYSTEM ) BUT I HOPE NOT...I am sure PRIVATE SCHOOLS AND state-supported Catholic schools- in Scotland as in Canada the Catholic schoolsa are state-supported -it was considered an important civil right after Catholic Emancipation.
HERE IS A GOOD ONE ( A REAL ONE)
"ESLER"
EXPECTED STUDENT LEARNING RESULTS...
We call him Herr Esler.....you VILL LEARN und if not VE VILL LEARN YOU GUT!!!
BTSA...BITSA
BEGINNING TEACHER SUPPORT PROVIDERS (we used to be mentors but now have been demoted we don't teach subject area competency but mearly measure how many times and how far the teacher is from the desk. We also measure classroom noice in decibels...)
HOW DO YOU EAT AN ELEPHANT (presumably a pro-voucher Republican) "ONE BITSA at a time" this is an authentic motivational shirt... OF COURSE THE CTA is NO ON THE RECALL, YES that ARNOLD IS A NAZI and YES on EL BUSTO (I will save the budget...but first what is a budget...I only finished my BA with 30 credits over the Internet four months ago..)
AUTHENTIC STANDARDS...
NO WONDER TAXES ARE HIGH oh me o my NO WONDER TAXES ARE HIGH.
OF Course DWM is a good one DEAD WHITE MALES...
not PC nor WASP but PiCAG
PINKISH CELTIC AMERICANIZED GAEL
(Waiting for his first Affirmative Action handout but not too hard...to busy working others complain..>I worked yesterday and the day before from 4PM to 8PM tutoring and correcting CELDTs
CALIFORNIA ENGLISH LANGUAGE DEVELOPMENT TEST and made$180 dollars ($80 dollars cash) ...You sweat you get...you snooze you loose...you get a free ride you don't know what tough is...but undeserved privilege has a long pedigree...any Jew can tell you that...until 1948 or so they suffered under quotas...until 1859 they were virutally excluded from the higher levels of English life...notice I said ENGLISH...
Hey before I go get this...UNDER THE NEW RULES IF THE STUDENT SPELLS ONE JUST ONE ANY WORD in ENGLISH THEY GET AT LEAST A "one" on a scale of 0-4. So there are very few ZEROS (a lot of ones!!!
NO more fives for excellent (Fillipinos educated by American Jesuits, Gaels educated by Spanish Jesuits and Chinese educated by Scots were embarrassing good)
ME ME ME.....I .......IS......AN.....BE...BE...BE...
SO.....SO...SO.... counts as a one except for one thing....THAT'S GAELIC NOT ENGLISH!!!!!! (:
'Strrruth ye get paid for that....Och aye...as lang as they pay me and the check dinna bounce I will serve the yoke..."
Posted by: Ricardo Munro on October 4, 2003 12:06 AMI suppose GWB gets an N. Bumped up to a C by the examining board.
Posted by: dirk strom on October 9, 2003 08:14 PM